The dreaded yearly mammogram happened! So I thought I would pass on some tips for those still young enough and those old enough to relate to gear up for this splendid event.....
To be prepared for the exam do these simple exercises at home:
ONE: Open your refrigerator door and insert one side of your chest. Shut the door as hard as possible and lean on the door for good measure.
TWO: Visit your garage floor at 3:00 AM when the cement is COLD. Take off your shirt and lie comfortably on the floor with one side of your chest wedged under the rear tire of the car. Ask a friend to slowly back the car up until your breast is sufficiently flattened and chilled. Turn over and repeat with the other side of your chest.
THREE: Freeze two metal bookends overnight. Invite a stranger into the room and press the bookends against your chest. The flatter the better to have the x-ray!
You are now prepared!!! A little humor never hurts to endure any experience and situation.....The mammogram wasn't as bad as it is sometimes......The miracle of medicine.....I am grateful........next............THE COLONOSCOPY IN JUNE!
8 comments:
Ha ha ha! My mom and I are laughing so hard right now! I have not had to go through that yet (thank goodness) but she agrees! We just love you! You are so funny! I am glad that you made through it!
Can't wait to hear your colonoscopy tips! he he! You crack me up!
That is the funniest thing ever!!! Thank you for the tips because I have to do that in the near future!! Like really soon!!! I wonder if Rod would get up with me and then drive the car over my chest? I'll ask him!! That would be a fun midnight date!! Love ya!!
I am dreading this!
Oh I can't wait to have my mamo done now!!! You gave me a good laugh! I have tried the Colonoscopy. The main event is no big deal, but drinking the Go Lightly about did me in!!! Not the best drink I've ever had!!! Yucky stuff!!
wow, that makes me not want to grow up. you crack me up. you use great imagery.
I've seen this before and it is SO TRUE! A man must have come up with the mammogram. You would think that some smart women could invent a better way. Oh well. I had mine last week and am good for another year.
It's good to hear that you are doing what you need to do to take care of yourself.
Love,
Susan
I am seriously laughing out loud right now! I have experienced a mammogram and that could not be more true! Thank you for suffering so we can enjoy you longer! Love You...
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